Good and Great

Good and Great

David Rim

A new song that has a simple melody and lyrics came out from Shinee member Key. I have been balancing as best as I can but I am not gymnast. Though I used to do a few flips, flairs and kick ups in my life time. I am through with the ass kissing to my face.

Been consuming more alcohol in the last week then decades combined.

I wish things were good and great~

I am grateful for God and probably my dad watching me from heaven like you dumbass kid. I'm glad that alcohol calms the central nervous system. You don't have to worry about me. I been standing firm for many years. I'm already a few steps ahead of you let me be.

Was excited for the week. Only to have it ripped apart from me. People are too quick to judge and technology makes it too easy to take things out of context. This will be the second time I place this in writing and hopefully it ends here. I wish I could kill myself figuratively. The impact of a repeated mistake is lessen. It does not have to trigger my diabetes since last time it caused my physical decline. I somehow predicted my own future. I am just heavily sadden. My heart feels like it's been ripped into pieces again.

This process though I do not know how to deal with. Never have through life. I keep hurting the people I would like to have in my life. Maybe it's not meant to be and is out of selfish ambitions. I cackle at my desk where one day people grab the snacks you brought out of love while ducking their head like they guilty of something. Then message you saying things like “omg these crackers are delicious af”. While turning around spitting your name out into the pit.

I'll continue to have trust issues. I'll continue to never want to be vulnerable or open. I'll probably just keep my head down and keep secluded. I will continue to loathe this world.

God in my weakness. Just help me and my brokenness. Not to give in to the hatred. Not to lash out in fury. Fk it slay my enemies for me…

(Should edit and delete for later)