Automatic

Automatic

David Rim

I'm trying to create a story. It's one sided love. I'm not looking for love. I am trying to understand the mission from God. As I move towards that prize in mind. Love is how I act out of. My words come out sharp like the hearts still bleeding love. Although the gauze is applied tightly it still stained crimson red. Can it be the devil's voices inside of my head again? God this is so beautiful why does it bring me so much turmoil stepping towards it.

The finger on the trigger. The armor of God truly cannot be pierced. Tell the angel Gabriel to leave me alone. I am tired of this fighting alone. You are supernatural compared to my being. The fights truly unfair. In Jesus name I pray for protection and seek guidance through these tears.

Selective, selfish, and desperate cries from the depths of the soul. Got asked about my job again. My mission is clear I made a promise to you father I would never let the children grow up without a role model. I won't let them hurt the women and abuse their position of power. How wretched are thou to call me to lead. God knows I cannot head towards this dream alone. I need someone equally powerful created specifically for me. Is it selective hearing when you spend time with God. Giving God the five W's and How.

The path I walk is perfect. I spout the nonesene of unequally yoked, but I have seen the positive, negative and greater purpose for this wisdom. I cannot help our souls are connected. Tell me I'm wrong when did I allow for this? I am always guarded.

How did anything even happen this way? I am busy now heading down a field of dreams. God if they are with me will they take this journey with me? As my soul cries out too deep. Jesus, they do not know how sick I was then. Just the gradual shift in grit, determination, and focus. I pray never ceasing.

As my friend said, "I just do not want to be hurt". This, an automatic self-defense response. Thank you for bringing people in sneakily to patch up the bullet wounds sustained over the years. You know, I know, they know, and why are we taking our sweet time?

God give them protection for I am too weak to~ God's got this not me. Automatic.